Friday, April 15, 2011

Emotional Me

I am an emotional person.
i am happy.i smile
i am sad. i cry
i am angry. i keep silent
i am exuberant. i laugh

last night was sad for me...cant slp the whole night :'(
but i am glad ure being honest with me
although u do need some prompting.
i know u have loved her once.
which is why u might be really close with her now.
i mean at the end of the day like you said, u 2 will still hv gan qing.
but let me tell u, although my pasts do not last long,
i have loved them once too
but i wont be that close with any of them now.
because i know that u would be hurt if i do.
and because i love you. i wont do anything to hurt you.
well, me and them. we still keep in contact.
but not in the kind of way u talk to her.
it hurts me to know that.
and i am just telling you that i'm feeling upset about this.
i really am affected by it.

and just to let you know
its hard to trust again once the trust is broken.

'Trust is like an eraser; it gets smaller after every mistake'
so pls prove to me that u r somebody whom i can have faith in.
and that i have made the right choice.

i love n care about u enough to get so affected.
and i really wish this sad feeling would stop.
whenever i see u, i think of this
and i get scared and sad.
zen me ban.
mayb its the phobia i get in the past.
im afraid u would do smth hurtful to me like what they did.

i think im dwelling on this too much.
but i just cant get this off my mind and heart.
i need reassurance.
but i dont know how im going to get that back from u...